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Top Signs You Need A New Car

Top Signs You Need A New Car

 

U.S. car sales are up, which means that Americans are once again out buying automobiles.  Does that include you?  It should if you recognize anything from these Top Signs You Need a New Car.

 

 

You're tired of listening to the Warrant tape that's been stuck in your player since '89.

 

While they look like new floor mats, that's actually 10 years of dropped French fries.

 

The "check engine" light that's been on in your car for three years has finally burned out.

 

It's called a Saab.  Not because of its brand.  Because that's what looking at it makes people do.

 

Every time you step on the gas, it wheezes like a fat man's Vespa.

 

It's getting harder to find replacement parts for a '72 Gremlin.

 

When you park it at the curb on garbage day, they try to take it.

 

Your Carfax is 73 pages long.

 

It's old enough to have a "John McCain for Continental Congress" bumper sticker.

 

It blows so much white smoke when you start it . . . people think they've elected a new pope.

 

You call it the "Chris Christie" because it makes a lot of noise and never runs.

 

One time you parked it and put "The Club" on the steering wheel . . . and you came back to see that someone stole The Club.

 

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